What is Forgiveness?
It is generally defined by psychologist as “a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness”.
What is Healing?
According to the oxford dictionary, healing is “the process of making or becoming sound or healthy again”.
For the purpose of this article, the definition from Charlene Muhommad is a good fit. “The process of bringing together aspects of one’s self, body-mind-spirit, at deeper levels of inner knowing, leading towards integration and balance with each aspect having equal importance and value.”
What is Progress.
Progress can be defined as “forward or onward movement towards a destination”(Oxford Dictionary). The word progress is a common word amongst professionals. You will often hear them say, “I have made so much progress in my career in the last couple of years”.
If you stand in the way of someone because you don’t want them to go up the ladder, you are making absolutely no progress yourself.
Rationale of the Heading.
Most times we allow ourselves to be held back by the things that have happened in our lives, and the experiences that haunt us daily. As per the title, in order to make progress, it is recommended to start with the process of forgiveness, by unpacking all your baggage from past experiences that still keep you under wraps.
A friend of mine told me a fascinating story about her life. Some 7 years back she was extremely upset with some family members, and a few persons whom she felt had hurt her irreparably. She was deeply sad and constantly pondered her revenge. She wanted to see them hurt so badly that she ended up being lured into the trap of consulting a witch doctor to cast a spell on these individuals. It was all so dramatic that she ended up even more hurt because of sleepless nights, boiling in anger. She developed excruciating migraine pain, and she was now exposed to evil forces. One faithful morning she was rushed to hospital and the Dr told her that her condition wasn’t medical. She didn’t understand what he meant, and she begged him for pain killers to numb her pain. He told her to offload her baggage, to forgive and let go in order to regain her health in the most natural way possible. Yep, you read that right!, she was suffering from the sickness of unforgiveness and bitterness which can never be cured, even at the world’s best hospital.
How Unforgiveness Affects You;
Sometimes we go without the realisation of the ravaging destruction that unforgiveness causes in our lives and the lives of those we care about. It actually;
- Steals your Joy
- Makes you proud
- Causes health risk related to bad toxins released into your brain as a result of anger
- Pushes you away from God
- Rips off your peace
In my case, until I made the decision to truly forgive those that hurt me, and abandoned all plans to see them pay for the pain they caused me, I was always in hurt, anger and stagnation. Making the decision to actively seek for a “body-mind-spirit” balance was the determinant that helped me to regain my physical health. You’ll probably agree that when you are physically well, it is likely that your mind will be at peace, and your spirit will be calm and happy too.
When your healing is done or on the way, the ability to make progress is set in motion. After putting down all your baggage in the forgiveness and healing phases, progressing towards your vision will be less burdensome.
Why Forgiveness is Important.
I would also like for you to take note of these astounding things that forgiveness does for you.
- Forgiveness suppresses bitterness , anger and resentment.
- Forgiveness optimizes your mental, emotional health and even your physical health.
- Forgiveness makes you a benefactor of God’s mercy and forgiveness too.
- Forgiveness enables you to practice God’s most important commandment( Love your neighbour as yourself ; Leviticus 19:18).
- Forgiveness catapults you into a journey of healing and progress to your God-given destiny.
How to Forgive.
Sometimes we hold back the need to forgive because we are scared of being hurt by that person or group again. But forgiveness doesn’t mean to lay down your guard around them, it just means you are no longer resentful and bitter towards them. To lay down that hurt and pain in your heart, you can do the following;
- Arrange a meeting with the person who hurt you and talk about it.
- Call them up on the phone and speak your mind to them.
- Write them a letter and express yourself to them.
- Send them a message via text.
- Reach out privately to them on any of their social media platforms and say your piece.
- Pen down all the pain they have caused you on a piece of paper, forgive them on there and release them from your heart. You can then burn the paper, or let it sail into some river.
I have added some books above, which will guide you as you embark on the journey to your full potential through forgiveness, healing and progress.
Hope you found this helpful, and may this article be a catalyst for your decision to forgive that friend, neighbour, in-law, parent, sister, brother, aunty, uncle, lawmaker,classmate, colleague, ex husband or wife, ex boyfriend/girlfriend, and anyone you may have been carrying in your heart and overburdening yourself.
God bless you, and I look forward to seeing you on the other side, totally transformed and making great strides in your life.